Mannnnnn, this story right here is hilarious … and sad.

OJ Simpson may have to continue to rot behind bars because he was rubbing one out. This is a real story. The Daily Mail reports that a female correctional officer caught the Juice pounding his pleasure piece and now he may be denied parole. “He is facing a disciplinary hearing after being written up for masturbating in his prison cell,” a prison source tells Daily Mail.

Simpson, who was acquitted of murdering his ex-wife Nicole Brown Simpson in 1995, was locked up in 2008 at the Lovelock Correctional Facility on charges of kidnapping and robbery after confronting a pair of memorabilia dealers with loads of OJ souvenirs at the Palace State Hotel. He was given a sentence of 33 years.

The former football player is set to face a parole board on Thursday, but since he was caught slapping that salami they may send him right back to the slammer.